“Open hands can’t receive blessings if they’re closed holding onto grudges” -Jason Sky
I don’t think I really forgave him for everything, from finding out he was still messing with his child’s mother to denying that we ever had anything. That hurt and not only did I have to deal with his lies I had to deal with her insecurities. The constant nerve of her calling herself a woman, his woman… It hurt. As time goes on I realized I’m only truly hurting myself because he’s going on with life and I’m still trying to get people to see the liar and cheater that he is.
True forgiveness is letting go of everything completely by not going back to what hurt you or dwelling on the situation.
How could I move forward and love someone else if I kept back tracking? Today I forgive him though for everything the hurt, the lies, slandering just everything. Today when I awoke I was free. Free from hurt that he caused and the pain.
Free from the ridicule I had received just FREE.
I forgave him for not being man enough to take ownership in raising our child but most importantly I didn’t just forgive him I forgave myself as well. I forgive myself for being so hard on myself and thinking that I failed as a woman, as a parent. I forgive myself for allowing someone to continue to play me and forgetting how worthy I was. Worthy of being LOVED, being VALUED, receiving RECIPROCITY, and being cared for GENUINELY.
Often times when women go through bad relationships or breakups we tend to forget who we are, who we used to be and who we want to be. We get lost in who we thought a person was or who they have the potential to be. I myself know what it is like to fall in love with potential having a good heart can always have us saying “If they just did this or if they just said this more”. Instead sometimes the best thing to say is but this is who they are right now. Are they capable of changing? OF COURSE, but can you truly change them?
Be okay with that individual not being ready or not displaying their full potential. You have to take it as a lesson learned, apply it to your life and move on. Forgive yourself. Live a life full of joy, happiness and peace. Because you deserve it and you owe it to yourself.
Today I forgave ME.
Love and Light